This is something that is very hard to admit, but my intention is to always be authentic.
I have spent too much of my life caring what other people thought about me.
It kept me over-striving, people-pleasing, unauthentic, scared, low, depressed, and small. I have always been shy and introverted. I don't believe in talking over others or shouting out in a crowd, so I can often be found in the corner of a party (if you get me there at all), quiet in a meeting that others are running, and often only sharing when asked.
DEEP, AUTHENTIC CONNECTIONS ROCK MY WORLD.
THEY ALWAYS HAVE.
These were not always easy to come by growing up. Because I preferred my own company or the company of those that I knew well and trusted, others chose to judge and label me a 'bitch' growing up.
This label has been hard for me to break down and shed over the years. I believed and embraced the label instead of fighting it for way too long. I began to think of it as a badge of strength after spending too much time looking to TV and movies in my teenage years, trying to find my way, but only seeing how much the media loves strong, hard, tough, bitchy women. They are portrayed all over television shows. They are the ones that all the men drool over, want, and desire. It is next to impossible to find dynamic, but kind and vulnerable women characters to relate to.
It has only been in recent years that I have begun to drop the idea that what others think of me creates my self-worth and am still doing healing around my self-worth.
A couple years ago, I offered my Pay What You Can Soul Seekers Virtual Workshop. I could have used this as a system to measure my worthiness by allowing others the opportunity to put a monetary value on my services.
I mean, really. I spent 5 years in school training to be a midwife, with a $75,000 student loan debt to show for it. I spent 10 years working with women as their primary health care provider during pregnancy, birth, and postpartum. I trained with a Shaman for 3 years. I studied and worked with energy healers and mystics for the last 15 years. I have spent significant time, money, and energy learning my craft and gathering the wisdom I hold inside of me today. I know I have a lot to offer.
So, when some paid me $1 (66 cents, after Paypal took their portion) for a service I normally charge $300 for, it could have felt like being left a penny as a food server after serving someone a $300 dinner. Even though I had friends and colleagues up in arms about the $1 payment, I chose to not allow this external representation to determine or challenge my self-worth.
My goal for offering the Pay What You Can Workshop, was to make sure money would not hold people back from participating if their Hearts and Souls desired to. I trust that people truly paid what they could, and that they placed more value on their own well-being than they do on their daily cup of coffee.
What I know to be true...my divine Mission Statement:
I AM A SACRED, DIVINE, SOULFUL, INTUITIVE, HEALER AND EMPATHIC LIGHT BEING WHOSE PASSION STEMS FROM GUIDING OTHERS IN FINDING THEIR OWN DIVINE LIGHT IN LIFE.
Here I am sharing my own Divine Value Ritual to guide you in finding your own Divine Mission Statement...
Divine Value Ritual
- To begin this ritual, find a quiet place, light a candle setting your intention, play some soothing music and take come nice, long deep breaths to deeply connect to yourself.
- Write down a list of all the things in your life that make you unique.
- From that list, create your own DIVINE MISSION STATEMENT, as I have done above.
- Write down your DIVINE MISSION STATEMENT in as many places as you can that you will see regularly this week. The more you write it, the more it becomes embedded in your subconscious, and the more it begins to rewire the neuropathways that are otherwise filled with the negative self-talk we tell ourselves. Write it in your daily calendar, your journal, your bathroom mirror, next to your desk, and on a sticky note in your car.
- Keep writing it down until you know it and feel it by Heart. By doing so, it allows your conscious mind to travel to your DIVINE MISSION STATEMENT the next time your self-worth is challenged by outside influences.
I would love to hear what your DIVINE MISSION STATEMENT is in the comments below, so we can hold each other up in our own unique DIVINE Self-Worth.
You can also share your Divine Mission Statement on social media and using #divinemissionstatement to spread your light by uplifting and encouraging others to do the same.
I love each and every one of you for sharing your struggles and your light with me, as I share my own. We are on this Soul Seeking journey together.