A month ago, I was sitting, wrapped in a paralyzing fear that was like a heavy blanket smothering my every breath. Standing on the edge of a cliff, knowing that in order to claim my soul's destiny, I had to use all of my energetic tools to leap off and fly.
A few of you know the 12 years of anxiety and panic attacks that I have been affected by.
They have paralyzed me, stolen jobs from me, stolen opportunities from me.
The time had finally come for me to confront my fear and anxiety before I missed another opportunity that came knocking.
In the last year, most of the anxiety and panic has fallen away, as I have worked diligently to create a life filled with Soul. My last lingering whisper of fear was around flying.
Just the thought of being in the air, in an enclosed space, away from my beloved earth, caused my heart to race and my breath to become shallow.
I felt like a fraud. How can I teach about facing and befriending fears, when I hadn't been willing to befriend my own?
The journey to befriend my fear, began in December 2015, when a lovely friend, Rachel, founder of Souldust, approached me about co-hosting a retreat in Paris.
My Soul immediately shouted YES! while my mind wanted to run and hide at the thought of GETTING to Paris. On a plane for 10 hours! My heart raced, but my Soul kept insisting. YES! YES! YES!
I believe a majority of me would have turned down the opportunity, if my partner had not been so adamant about me not allowing this opportunity to pass me by.
The time had come to befriend my fear and begin my healing journey with flying.
Last month, I was sitting on the precipice of a flight. This would be my very first flight to the East Coast, and the longest flight I had taken in 5 years. A mini test-run for my journey to Paris.
The week leading up to the trip, I began connecting to all the healing tools I felt I intuitively needed:
- Shamanic Journey: A hawk gave me the reminder to embrace the magic of flying. He asked me to imagine he was the plane and I was riding upon his back.
- Tapping: I began loving and accepting myself, right where I was, fears and all, so I could begin to change how being in a plane felt to me.
- Visualization: In my preparations, I was gifted the vision of a rainbow highway, running from Seattle to Washington, DC, that the plane would travel on. Any turbulence I felt were merely bumps on the rainbow highway, not a plane being thrown around in the air (I know, mind tricks work magic!).
- Grounding: It was a gift from the divine, the idea that even if I am off the ground, I can still remain grounded. So I created a grounding cord, that was firmly planted into the Earth, when we took off from Seattle, and I imagined that cord like a rubber band, stretching all the way to Washington, DC until we landed. Then, I released the grounding cord until we flew back and reversed the process.
Not only did I survive the trip, but I thrived. Facing and befriending my fear, even with my past negative experiences, have given my Soul new wings to fly with.
I am now completely excited about the journey ahead to Paris, instead of just halfheartedly excited, while secretly dreading it.
I can co-build the Paris retreat, focusing on Women Rebirthing Their Lives Through Their Senses, from a place of fully saying YES to all that lies ahead.
Where will befriending your fears lead you? Are you ready to find out?
All love. All soul.